Never Say Die

Some people come into your life for a moment, a day, or for a lifetime.

It matters not the time they spent with you but how they impacted your life at that time.

Dear Chris,

I saw your name on social media and clicked on it fully expecting to see you smiling back at me. Instead, I saw an account remembering your life. For a few seconds, I wondered if it was some kind of joke?

Then I read your obituary..

At the age of 45, you were gone.

Our paths first crossed in 1981 when I started a new school. You were a lovely looking boy with twinkling eyes and a great sense of humour. Everybody liked you. Even the weirdos, like me. You made people laugh simply by being you. You didn’t pick on me like the rest of the boys and you’d never join in with the name-calling. In fact, you’d have a go at them and tell them not to be so ‘tight’ on me. That got you some flack, not that it bothered you.

I’ve never forgotten your kindness.

I never will.

By 1985 a friendship had developed between us. Not boyfriend and girlfriend. Just a two friends who shared a love of heavy metal music. You’d walk home with me after school and I felt safe when I was with you because I knew the others wouldn’t try anything while you were there. Some girls have knights in shining armour. My knight wore scuffed shoes and a blazer.

One of the first records I borrowed from you was Axe Attack which I played over and over again much to my parent’s annoyance. If I remember correctly, my Black Sabbath LP – Never Say Die – was originally yours?

When it felt as though the world was against me – you made a difference. You were a shining light in a very dark world – not that you were ever aware just how deeply I was affected by the bullying.

Nobody did, except me.

No doubt you continued to light up people’s worlds as you went through your life. You had a lovely wife and two handsome boys. I’m so sorry they’ve lost you when you had so much more to give. To lose you at such a young age is cruel. It seems so unfair that evil people live to an old age and so many good people die too young..

This is where I struggle with God.

This is where I question. why?

Why you?

You will always be the boy with the spiky hair and a twinkle in his eye.

That’s how I will remember you.

I can see you now – big grin on your face. 15 forever, eh?

I hope that your heaven plays non-stop rock music and you get to watch over your family until they can be with you again. When I eventually get my arse up there – be sure to say hi won’t you?

Chris, I don’t believe that we ever really die and so it’s seems apt to dedicate this record to you.

Thanks for being my friend.




8 thoughts on “Never Say Die

  1. That must have been such a huge shock to have come across this news by chance Tracy, especially as you had no idea at all.
    The more we love someone the bigger the hurt by their death.
    Heaven must be full of good people ❤️………💔
    I bet your mind has been recalling lots of your friendship moments.
    Hugs 🤗 xxxxxx

    Liked by 1 person

    • It was a shock. He was a good person and it’s always sad when people like that die so young when other people live to old ages. It doesn’t seem very fair at all. xxxxx


  2. I follow several blogs and often skim through them to see which ones if like to catch up with that day. Yours is one of the very few who’s posts I always make a point of catching up with and always read them in their entirety. With that in mind, I also accept that between the many laughs you deliver for us, your readers, there will also be some sadness.
    You write well, with meaning and feeling and I think you have a fitting tribute to your friend.
    Our time on this rock is limited but it is in others that out existence continues. And it is in them that our purpose and meaning is often felt, understood and demonstrated.
    No amount of money can we take with us begin this life, however, we can leave behind whatever we choose to. In your friend’s case he left happy memories for those around him whose lives he touched, affected and, at times, changed.
    You know my views on God etc and the afterlife but, fall all our sakes, I hope to one day be proven wrong and perhaps when I’m up there I’ll look your friend up…..and we can headband the shit out of some Black Sabbath

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Sorry to hear your loss, it is tough to get your head around, I don’t think anyone has the answers why some people die at one age and others grow old. All you can do is hold to the good stuff becuase that is the only thing we have control over X

    Liked by 1 person

  4. So sorry Tracy, 45 is no age.

    Lovely to read what a positive impact he had on your life though. We teach our kids so much and yet the most important lesson is just being… nice. It should be on the curriculum. I can’t think of anything more important, that impacts more prefoundly, than just being nice.


    • Thanks Mark, he probably knew he’d get some flack for standing up for me but he did it anyway. Being nice to people is one of the most important things you can be because it’s often those little actions – a smile – or a kind word that can make a difference.


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